Today is the day to throw away that pathetic umbrella..

There are only a few t-shirts left. Do we have one in your size? Find them here!

I have not one but two new "Showtracker" columns up on the LA Times website and in the paper, for "Dancing With the Stars."

Along with my columns is a copy of one of the most amazing emails I've ever received in my life regarding my first showtracker:

Claire, Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Michele Elyzabeth and I represent Heather Mills. I read your piece this morning and I think that it is a pity that you think so little of Heather. She is a true activistand has been for years. I truly wonder what you are basing your comments on. Your sense of humor is very disturbing. I hope for your sake that you never have to be judged by your peers.

There are many things that ran through my mind when I got this email.

1.) Am I such a superstar awesome writer that now if I write about someone famous, they're bound to contact me? (Obviously).

2.) What does that mean in terms of my power and responsibility? And who else should I write about then? Because no offense to Ms. Mills but I would probably rather email with Joey Fatone. Or is it limited to "Dancing with the Stars?" If I write "Hey Keanu Reeves! Why have you been dressing like a homeless guy lately?" Does that mean he'll email me back angrily (we'd inevitably be friends and I'd convince him to freshen up and look good again). The possibilities are endless and the power awe-inducing.

3.) This is the closest I've ever come to a Beatle. That's exciting.

Anyway, I gave Ms. Mills her props in the second column because she did a very good job with that mambo. However the Times' website has helpfully put up a comments section so if you agree or disagree with Michele Elyzabeth {sic}, then I encourage you to weigh in!