September 29,
2004
Today is the day to just do the damn thing.
Plenty of material for you to enjoy this day. Or not enjoy, this is America after all.
A list on McSweeney's, hopefully my last that has to do with the "I Love the Decade" shows. Boy, I really milked that one for all it was worth, and possibly more.
What do Noam Chomsky and I have in common? Other than awesome last names, we both have pieces in the current "Politics and Religion" issue of Mississippi Review. Read my piece "Blaming J.Lo." Actual social commentary!
Tomorrow, my love columnist, Luvvie Smalls is in. Send her a question about romance, dating, relationships, won't you?
Finally, if you'd like to hear my whiny, nasal, phlegmy voice, tune into the Chicago NPR affiliate today. You can catch it here sometime between 9:30-11.
Back to work, thinking about politics and tomorrow.
The Debate Between Al Gore and Me, Were I to Travel Back in Time to 2000
The First Gore-Bush Presidential Debate
MODERATOR: Good evening from the Clark Athletic Center at the University of Massachusetts in Boston. I'm Jim Lehrer of the NewsHour on PBS, and I welcome you to the first of three 90-minute debates between the Democratic candidate for president, Vice President Al Gore and Claire Zulkey.
(Applause)
MODERATOR: And now the first question as determined by a flip of a coin, it goes to Vice President Gore. Vice President Gore, you have questioned whether Claire Zulkey has the experience to be President of the United States. What exactly do you mean?
GORE: Well, Jim, first of all, I would like to thank the sponsors of this debate and the people of Boston for hosting the debate. I would like to thank Claire Zulkey for participating, and I would like to say I'm happy to be here with Tipper and our family. I have actually not questioned Claire Zulkey's experience. I have questioned her proposals.
MODERATOR: Claire Zulkey, one minute rebuttal.
ZULKEY: Oh yeah? Like what?
MODERATOR: So I take it by your answer, then, Mr. Vice President, in an interview recently with the "New York Times" when you said that you questioned whether or not Claire Zulkey has experience enough to be president, you were talking about strictly policy differences.
GORE: Yes, Jim. I said that her tax cut plan, for example, raises the question of whether it's the right choice for the country. And let me give you an example of what I mean. Under Claire Zulkey's tax cut proposal, she would spend more money on tax cuts for the wealthiest 1% than all of the new spending that he proposes for education, health care, prescription drug and national defense all combined.
ZULKEY: That's not true. Well, wait a second. Maybe it is. I don't know. I didn't even know I had a tax cut plan. Are you messing with me?
MODERATOR: Let me just follow up one quick question. When you hear Vice President Gore question your experience, do you read it the same way, that he's talking about policy differences only?
ZULKEY: Umm...policy differences...only?
GORE: Jim, if I could just respond. I know that.
ZULKEY: I would hope so. Jeez.
MODERATOR: One minute rebuttal.
GORE: Now, one thing I don't understand, Jim, is why is it that the wealthiest 1% get their tax cuts the first year, but 95% of seniors have to wait four to five years before they get a single penny?
ZULKEY: Seriously, don't ask me.
GORE: If I could respond to that. Under my plan I will put Medicare in an iron clad lockbox and prevent the money from being used for anything other than Medicare.
ZULKEY: Lockbox?
MODERATOR: Your --
GORE: It's just clear you can go to the website and look. If you make more than $25,000 a year you don't get a penny of help under the Zulkey prescription drug proposal for at least four to five years, and then you're pushed into a Medicare -- into an HMO or insurance company plan, and there's no limit on the premiums or the deductibles or any of the conditions. And the insurance companies say it won't work and they won't offer these plans.
ZULKEY: Now hold on a second. I'm not sure where you're getting this information. I don't have any plans that I know of, on the Internet or offline.
GORE: The difference is I want to bring it to 100% and she wants to bring it to 5%.
ZULKEY: Bring what to 5%? What? Can I just go? Can we just say that he wins?
GORE: Let me call your attention to the key word there.
ZULKEY: Which one?
GORE: It's a two-phase plan. For the first four years -- it takes a year to pass it and for the first four years only the poor are covered. Middle class seniors like George McKinney and his wife are not covered for four to five years.
ZULKEY: George who?
GORE: Excellent question.
ZULKEY: Tee hee.
GORE: Let me clarify. I'm for doing something both on the supply side and production side and on the consumption side.
ZULKEY: Cool.
GORE: I found a couple of other things we agree upon. We may not find that many this evening, so I wanted to emphasize. I strongly support new investments in clean coal technology. I made a proposal three months ago on this.
ZULKEY: Ooh, three months ago, la de da. Back when clean coal technology was 'cool' and hadn't sold out yet, right?
MODERATOR: Vice President Gore?
GORE: I think a woman's right to choose ought to be protected and defended.
ZULKEY: You stay away from my uterus.
GORE: Bear in mind that we have a lot of sanctions in force against Serbia right now.
ZULKEY: Fine, just, you know. Back off.
MODERATOR: Vice President Gore, how should the voters go about deciding which one of you is better suited to make the kinds of decisions, whether it's Milosevic or whatever, in the military and foreign policy area?
GORE: Well, they should look at our proposals and look at us as people and make up their own minds. When I was a young man, I volunteered for the Army. I served my country in Vietnam.
ZULKEY: Jim, I'd just like to say that that's irrelevant, as I was born after the Vietnam war and I could not serve even if I had the choice.
MODERATOR: Claire, how would you advise the voters to make the decision on this issue?
GORE: If I could say one thing.
ZULKEY: No.
GORE: One of the key points in foreign policy and national security policy is the need to establish the old-fashioned principle that politics ought to stop at the water's edge. When I was in the United States Congress, I worked with former President Reagan.
ZULKEY: <making blah-blah hand motion.>
MODERATOR: Do you have a problem with that?
ZULKEY: No, sir. Sorry.
GORE: This is a very important moment in the history of our country.
ZULKEY: That the Vice President is debating a 20-something person who is not even running for office? I think it's weird, maybe not so important.
GORE: Not so.
ZULKEY: Eh, whatever you say.
MODERATOR: Having cleared that up, we're going to a new question. Education.
ZULKEY: That's not really a question.
GORE: . I would like to tell you a quick story. I got a letter today as I left Sarasota, Florida. I'm here with a group of 13 people from around the country who helped me prepare. We had a great time. Two days ago we ate lunch at a restaurant. The guy that served us lunch gave me a letter today. His name is Randy Ellis. He has a 15-year-old daughter named Caley, who is in Sarasota High School. Her science class was supposed to be for 24 students. She's the 36th student in that classroom. They sent me a picture of her in the classroom. They can't squeeze another desk in for her, so she has to stand during class.
ZULKEY: That's a beautiful story, Al. But what. Does that have. To do. With education?
GORE: I didn't say that.
ZULKEY: Well you shouldn't be telling us about whosit and whatever from wherever. We don't care.
MODERATOR: New question. We've been talking about a lot of specific issues. It's often said that in the final analysis about 90% of being the President of the United States is dealing with the unexpected, not with issues that came up in the campaign.
ZULKEY: Well, I pretty much am totally unprepared, so there you go.
MODERATOR: Vice President Gore?
GORE: First I want to compliment Claire Zulkey on her response to those fires and floods in Texas. I accompanied James Lee Witt down to Texas when those fires broke out.
ZULKEY: Thank you. I am anti-flood. Who is James Lee Witt?
GORE: Can I comment on that?
ZULKEY: Oh, wait, did I meet James Lee Witt adn I forgot who he is? God, that's so embarrassing.
MODERATOR: Both of you have Social Security reform plans, so we could spend the rest of the evening and two or three other evenings talking about them in detail. We won't do that. But --
GORE: Suits me.
ZULKEY: Okay.
MODERATOR: We're almost out of time.
ZULKEY: Thank God.
GORE: Just briefly. When FDR established Social Security, they didn't call them IOUs, they called it the full faith and credit of the United States. If you don't have trust in that, I do. If you take it out of the surplus in the trust fund, that means the trust fund goes bankrupt in this generation within 20 years.
ZULKEY: Ok, whatever, are we done?