Today is the day to heatedly bring up religion at a nice dinner party.
Today you can read a piece I read for Chicago Public Radio online--one that I first published on this very site. The fine folks at WBEZ weren't happy to let things be the way they were: they also put together some liner notes, hitting up my Mom for some humor. Hey Mom, I'm the one who bought Zulkey.com--step off!
This piece first appeared on Claire's Web site, where one of my favorite features is an advice column by her mom. So in honor of Claire's first appearance on the re-launched “WBP”:
Dear Mrs. Zulkey.com,
Using five words from this slang dictionary, please tell us a feel-good story about Claire.
Love,
“Writers' Block Party”
Here's her response:
At Claire's grammar school it was a tradition, at graduation, for the faculty to bestow on each student some particular recognition which would follow the form of “Girl/Boy Most Likely To...” Some would be humorous, some laudatory and some rather cappin'. They were accompanied by small trophies which, while they made nice keepsakes, were in fact pretty bo bo. Her Dad and I couldn't imagine what her singular distinction might be since she, like all of her close friends, were real beasts, virtual poppinses.
When her name was at last called we were cheezin' since we were sure our seed would get her props. We were not disappointed. She was named “Girl Most Likely to Get Her Project/Homework/Term Paper Done a Week Before Its Due Date.” It was not only money, it was hella wicked. We enthusiastically gave it up.
Do I smell some sort of double bill with “WBP's” musical advice col-hum-nist, Tony Rogers? Thanks, Mrs. Zulkey.com—you rock!
Also, put Friday, October 6 on your calendar: Claire will be reading at “The Dollar $tore.” See you there!
—“WBP” producer Shiow-Jiau Yung