Today is to do your laundry--and don't mess it up this time!

Things My Friend Jane Calls "America's Got Talent" to Piss Off Her Parents, Who Apparently Seem to Like the Show

America's Got Herpes!

America's Got Head Lice!

America's Got Rabies!

America's Got Intestinal Parasites!

America's Got A Drinking Problem!

America's Got Obsessive Compulsive Disorder!

America's Got Two Mommies!

America's Got A Crush on You!