July
30,
2003
Today is the day to do a triple spit take.
Rank: Ways of Observing a Baseball Game
- Well, duh, in person. I maintain that a baseball game is the single best
date choice a couple can choose (and if you're dating somebody who refuses
to go to a game, break up with them, immediately.) Why is this? If the date
is boring, you have beer, food, and a game to watch. If the game is boring,
you have a date, beer, and food to observe. Drawbacks: It only is viable
a few months out of the year. And you could get clonked by a ball.
- On the radio. It's great because you can listen to a game and do something
else you like, such as cook, drive, or watch the game on TV. Drawbacks:
If there is a squirrel on the field, you can't fully observe the hilarity.
- On TV. I just think this is probably the most boring, because if the game
stinks, you don't have the distractions of the real-life game to entertain
you. Also, for some reason the adorably cheesy radio announcers just seem
cheesy when they're on TV. Exception: When you're at a bar and it's really
boring there and you can observe the TV. Otherwise, TVs in restaurants and
bars result in Rude Staring Over Your Shoulder Dinner Companion Syndrome.
Drawbacks: As dumb as the Wave is, you're even dumber when you do it at
home.
- The Internet. Drawbacks: As exciting as it is, your arm starts to hurt after clicking 'return' too much.