Today is the day to look up the origin of the term "safe as houses" and get back to me on it.

Are you aware that there is a new consumer product to fill the void in your up-'til-now aimless life?

It's the new Starbucks Mocha Coconut Frappacino.

I was with a friend in downtown Chicago today and tried said Frappacino, being an admitted Starbucks head. I thought that I'd seen it all. The caramel macchiato, the caramel hot apple cider, the citrus tazo, the raspberry mocha.

Oh no, my friends.

The Mocha Coconut Frappacino is a thing of beauty, a frosty chocolately coconut beverage whipped icily and then covered with a mile of whipped cream, then drizzled with chocolate syrup and roasted shaved coconut.

It was like a Girl Scout Samoa cookie in a cup, and I felt like a Starbucks virgin, touched for the very first time.

Walking down the street, people were actually staring at the drink (at least, I think it was the drink, and not the glutton indulging in such drink.) One woman actually stopped me and asked me where she could purchase said drink. She had a French accent.

You see? The Starbucks Mocha Coconut Frappacino is not only delicious, but it bridges the cultural gap.

Way to go, Starbucks!

Of course, in some cruel twist of fate, the Starbucks Mocha Coconut Frappacino is only available for a limited time, so I advise you to drink as many as them as possible before they go away (making a timely exit, no doubt, not unlike Johnny Carson or Michael Jordan) so you can solidify it in your memory.

If you're not, well, what kind of a masochist are you?