They're learning about feelings at Paul's school right now and while picking him up last week I saw a project where each kid said what makes him or her feel happy, angry and sad. I thought you might like to know what's going on in the hearts and minds of America's three-year-olds.

I feel happy...

When Mom and Dad give me hugs

When Mommy says a funny joke

When I play with toys

When somebody gives me a hug

When Alec tickles me in the tummy

When I wake up in the morning

When I get hugs from Mama

When Madelyn makes me happy

When somebody hugs me

When I go to school and dance at home

When my brother shares

When I get to have a treat

When I'm making a picture

When I go with Daddy to swimming class

I feel angry...

When my brother plays with my toys

When Daddy gets mad

When my mom and dad take my favorite toys at my house

When somebody hits me

When friends hit my shoulder

When it's bedtime

When Madelyn hits me

When my Mama and Dad put some of my clothes in Dorothy's drawer

When Sophia's not being nice

When Mason doesn't share

When Austin takes my toys

When My brother says "You can't catch me!"

When nobody is playing with me

When I fall down

I feel sad...

When I'm afraid of the dark

When I get water in my eyes

When I bump my head

When somebody takes a toy from me

When Alec hits my head

When I'm in the dark in my bedroom

When someone hits me

When I hurt my leg

When somebody hits me

When someone hits me

When my brother hits me

When my brother hits me

When I'm alone

When I want to go to a new center

So there you have it. Somebody should get to the bottom of this epidemic of people hitting all these poor three-year-olds. And, yeah, I'm not ashamed to admit it publicly--if you deserve it, I will stone-cold take your favorite toy from you.