Don't forget, Chicagoans: tonight is Women of Letters! So many talented women (plus me) in one room, all laying it down!

You may recognize today's interviewee, an English nanny, from the shows "Family S.O.S. with Jo Frost" and "Nanny 911," the latter of which I used to watch as a form of birth control (just kidding: I just used to find families with out-of-control kids weirdly fascinating until I realized that could be me any day now.) In addition to helping families with her friendly but firm in-person help, she's also the author of several books, most recently Jo Frost's Toddler Rules: Your 5-Step Guide to Shaping Proper Behavior, which is currently relevant to my interests (anyone have any tips on how to teach a small child how to walk down the sidewalk holding hands in a way that does not make him scream and cry and sit on the sidewalk?) She's a very busy lady so she answered what she could of the questions I sent her:

What do parents most often seem to misunderstand about toddlers?
Parents often misunderstand that toddlers need to be taught and will not always understand or 'get it' the first time you explain.

My son is one and a half, so not quite technically a toddler but definitely emerging from babyhood and starting to express himself, sometimes happily, sometimes not. How would you advise someone with a kid this age to know when it's best to try to discipline him and when he's just being a baby? It's getting more difficult to know when he's just trying things out vs. when he's on the precipice of naughty.
1 to 5 is the age of toddler-hood. Children cannot be put on time out until they are roughly 2 years of age and when you can generally see strong signs of cognitive development. Until then, your tone of voice and facial expressions let your young toddler know when he is misbehaving. Remember, children of this age are also exploring the world around them so please do not mistake that for misbehavior.

What's your policy for when you're out in public (as a citizen and not as Jo Frost, Supernanny) and see a parent mishandling and incident with his or her child? Intervene or keep quiet?
I do both. I always smile acknowledging a parent's effort and have often helped parents on airplanes. I have become the new in-flight nanny marshal!

I used to watch "Supernanny" and "Nanny 911" before I was even considering having kids and I'm sure I wasn't the only childless person to do so. Why do you think people are so obsessed with "bad" kids and their parents?
They are not. We, as human beings are interested in how others live and what goes on behind closed doors. I guess we are all a little voyeuristic.

How often on "Supernanny" or any of the other shows you've worked on did you run into families problems much deeper than mismanaging their kids (I.E. there seemed to be signs of abuse, or addiction, or mental health issues.)? What did you do?
If helping a family I find signs of addiction, mental health etc., the family would always be given the additional help needed so that this specialized help could be intervened with my strategies and techniques for that family.

My husband and son and I are very lucky in that we have excellent support, from the boy's grandparents to his daycare provider to his babysitter. What are the best ways we can show our appreciation and make their jobs easier as our son starts becoming a more autonomous creature?
Being on the same page, always communicating and lots of gratitude.