Today is the day to type LOL after every sentence you write, even if it'st not funny.

Hello: If you live in Chicago, I have a book review in this week's Time Out Chicago. Also, there are two cool events in the events section. Oh, and there will be more to come on this but do not fail to buy Chicago Noir!

I used a new method to find today's interviewee: I made fun of him, albeit in a fond, envious-of-his-success way. Well, it always proves that you should watch what you say about people, because he found it and tracked me down and only swore at me a little bit. He is the editor at large at Esquire and author of The Know-it-All, and soon The Year of Living Biblically, a tale of trying to live according to the rules of the Old and New Testament.

The AJ Jacobs Interview: Less Than Twenty Questions Than Usual Because I Already Asked Him Some Questions Here

Have you received any word from religious organizations about your new book project, in terms of support or disapproval?
Not quite yet. The most common responses from friends seem to be:
-How will I be able to avoid the Sin of Onan part for an entire year.
-Be careful when handling snakes.
-Thank God you won’t be coveting my wife.

I hear that the film version is going to be produced by Plan B, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston’s production company. That said, what is with Maddox, Angelina Jolie’s first kid? Why doesn’t he ever walk? He’s kind of big to be carried everywhere, isn’t he?
Um. No comment.

How did you come to publish “Fractured Fairy Tales?” What sort of permissions did you have to get to work on it?
That was an assignment from a friend of mine at Bantam, which owned the rights to Rocky and Bullwinkle and Fractured Fairy Tales. I basically watched the videos, pressed pause once in awhile, typed in dialogue, and sent it to the publisher. Not my proudest moment as a writer. As a typist, though, I did show some flair. I think that’s probably my last novelization. Unless the Dukes of Hazard producers want me to write their novelization. That would be awesome.

What have been some of your "What it Feels Like"s?
For those who haven’t seen it, this is a book that collects amazing first-person tales – like what it feels like to walk on the moon by Buzz Aldrin or what it feels like to be struck by lightning by, well, a guy who was struck by lightning. I particularly loved what it feels like to be over 7 feet tall by basketball player Sean Bradley. He talks about how it’s a dirty existence. You see the tops of everyone’s refrigerators, and no one cleans up there, so you’re always looking at bottles and dust and weird discarded clothing items.

What did it feel like to have your book recommended by Oprah?
I’m no Jonathan Franzen. I freakin’ loved it. Though I was sad that she didn’t have me on the show. She opted to have the guy from the book who survived an avalanche come on her show instead. His tale of heroic survival is more interesting than how I chopped out 50 words and changed the punctuation? Wha?

Why do you think men's magazines feature more nonfiction and harder-hitting reporting than women's?
Are you trying to make me the new Larry Summers? I honestly don’t know. I don’t think it has to do with innate brain differences between males and females. But I do know that lots of women love to read Esquire for the nonfiction, which is very flattering.

Which of the encyclopedia volumes was the most interest overall? The most boring?
Well, I did love the Q volume, since it was so short. Only a couple of hundred pages. Plus I learned a great Scrabble word – qa. Just the two letters. It’s a Babylonian liquid measurement, in case you didn’t know. The S’s were a little tough. More than 1000 pages. Like the Heartbreak Hill in the Boston Marathon

When and why did Steven Seagal threaten to throw you out a window?
I was assigned to write an article on him. And I guess he didn’t really agree with the thesis, which was that his career was over.

Obviously, you took part in this so it might color your feelings towards it, but in general, do you think authors should be able to address their critics in a public forum?
Only if their reviewers have psychotic breakdowns.

That said, have you communicated directly with Joe Queenan since he published his review of your book? If not, would you like to?
No, I haven’t. As for whether I’d like to: Well, the Bible does say love thine enemy.

Have you encountered many obnoxious people who are eager to beat you in terms of the knowledge you picked up during the Know it All?
Only every day. It’s interesting to see the different types of know-it-alls around the country. I was particularly fond of the know-it-all who came to the reading at Santa Cruz. He informed me that it is a known fact that Christopher Columbus came to America in search of hashish. Sort of a very long dope run. As Cindy Adams might say, only in Santa Cruz.

Your wife is quoted as thinking your experiment in outsourcing your life was “pathetic.” Is she mainly a patient woman?
She’s crazy patient. I think after the Bible book is over, she will officially be eligible for sainthood.

How will “The Know It All” be treated in script form?
It’ll have some of the same elements – but be much more dramatic. My wife leaves me in the middle. I’m fired from my job. You know. Drama! Also, there are parts of the movie where the encyclopedia comes to life, so that’s fun to write.

You mention your family in the book: did they mind that at all?I was a little concerned that my brother-in-law Eric wouldn’t think it was too funny, since he is the nemesis in the book. But I did something that I encourage all writers to do with potentially tricky characterizations: Right up front, I called him ‘moderately good-looking’ and pointed out that he was not balding. That seemed to be what he most focused on.

What advice do you have for writers starting families, on how to balance work and family time?
Do not work in the house! I tried that for six months, and it was a disaster. Keep them separate.

How does it feel to be the 129th person interviewed for Zulkey.com?
It feels better than being 7 feet tall. And much better than being trapped in an avalanche. Also, I love Zulkey.com. I should be interviewing you.

Aw, thanks. More interviews here.