I have interviewed Samantha Irby three times now--I just can't get enough of her! But the story is that I interviewed her once here, and then I was asked if I could interview her for Emily Books and then for a third publication. Things didn't work out with the third publication but I love Sam--and know I'm not he only one--and didn't want the interview to go away. So to entice you to buy her amazingly hilarious new book of essays Meaty and also to come to Funny Ha-Ha: Thanks a Lot, where she'll be reading. Yay Sam! I think I know everything about her now. Caution to my parents and people who are like them: this interview contains language of the colorful variety.Â
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You've been writing seriously at least since high school. How much do you go back and read your older stuff, and what do you think has been the biggest change you've made to your writing in the last ten years or so?
i never read my old shit. never ever.Â
it's totally embarrassing. i won't even read something i wrote two months ago. makes me cringe.
i think because i'm one of those writers who will change something every time i read it? i will just tweak and edit and revise the shit out of a thing, which is why i don't read anything once i consider it finished. i would never stop working on it.
You have a dayjob and an offline life. How and where do you draw the line between being an online and literary personality and being your own self?
i try to keep them as close together as possible. i would say that bitchesgottaeat sam is my personality turned up to a 12. and in my real life i'm usually hovering somewhere between 4 and 8, depending on how shitty i feel.
What advice would you give someone who was contemplating opening up his or her personal life to the nitty-gritty details to the public the way that you have? Is there anything you'd warn or advise a person in terms of what to think twice about holding back, or how to interact with readers who feel comfortable enough to discuss your bodily functions--or their bodily functions--with you?
i am pretty shameless.
so butt stuff and sex stuff don't really bother me. i'm more self-conscious writing about my insecurities and weight problems than i am about getting fucked by some dummy.
i would advise people to think about their workplace before putting anything online. like, i don't know that i could ever be hired as a teacher. or work in a church. no self-expression is worth getting a pink slip. my boss is a cool boss, and he doesn't give a fuck about any of this vagina talk as long as i show up every day. the problem though is that he is never allowed to die. or retire.
because i can't work for anyone else, real talk.
What did working with a small press offer you that working with one of the big boys did not?
curbside basically said, "do whatever you want and we will edit you for style, not content." AND THEY DID. i almost shit myself. i wrote about dicks and butts and fatness and race shit and they were cool with all of it. i got to make a book that is 100% mine, and i'm willing to bet that NEVER happens at a major.
How crazy are you going to get about tracking other people's responses to the book? Are you going to read the reviews? Track its Amazon rankings? (If yes to either one, what are you doing to gird your loins against either heartbreak or bigheadedness?)
not crazy at all. i am not going to read a goddamned thing.
the arrogant asshole in me is all, I DON'T CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK. but that just isn't true. i want to plead my case with every nasty commenter: prove to them why they're wrong, charm them into liking me. and that's stupid.Â
so i am going to spare myself the shame spiral. not reading any of it.
How famous do you want to be? Be specific with your secret dream.
i would like to be chicago famous.
which means: bitches let me jump the line at big star or pick up my tab at scofflaw because they know me. i basically just want to be recognized without having to change what i eat or worry about what i'm wearing.
real famous means people digging through your trash and looking at what's in your grocery cart, and that's lame. i just want people to enjoy my work while allowing me to be as fat and homely as i want.
people who are really famous don't get to have calves as big as mine, i'm pretty sure.
What do you hope to be your next big project?
my japanese homie carly and i want to start a podcast called "twinkie and oreo." i'll wait while you figure out why that's hilarious.
basically we're going to talk about funny shit and play music and you will probably love it. i've already started thinking about what might go in a second essay collection, but i don't really want to think about that for at least a year or two? i mostly just want to keep writing my blog and doing a show every now and then. and find someone handsome and interesting who wants to buy me dinner every once in a while.
Describe to me where you write and when and on what programs and what type of computer and what you wear and eat when you do it.
during the day i usually write my blog at work, on my lunch break. on this dell desktop that i once crashed while trying to download a drake mixtape. while wearing all-black daytime pajamas (ie, yoga pants) and a giant scarf, basically the only thing i ever wear. or a cropped jacket. i really like a cropped, fitted jacket or hoodie. i don't pay for internet at home because i would just be awake at 2am trying to scroll through celebrity tweets or whatever, so if i'm not working i drag myself and my tiny nondescript netbook to cafes that won't kick me out for sitting in them all day. i like the heartland, growling rabbit, the one on sheridan that used to be pillars, metropolis on granville, and the edgewater starbucks across from nookies. i drink a lot of hippie smoothies and black iced teas and chai lattes. these days i am gluten- and dairy-free (AHAHAHAHAHA LOL FOREVER LIFE SUCKS LOL) so i don't eat shit. i just sit there scowling at everyone's muffins. jerks.
What's the most recent live reading you did? What did you read and why? What was the reaction?
i just did reading under the influence at sheffield's. i read the tampon sex sex from "fifty shades of grey" (because the theme was "firsts") which went over hilariously well, and then an essay called "elena tyler, aka why i can't be mad at lena dunham" from my book. which is my first. it was a riot. i sweated through so many pictures with people who'd just purchased a book that is mostly about my butthole. the evening was a win, for sure.
As a participant and producer of live lit, what are your biggest reading pet peeves (from producers, readers and audience members?)
producers: not curating hard enough, not setting time limits, not making sure that the shit is fast and smooth and put together. if i wanted to watch a bunch of half-assed bullshit i'd stay home and make the cat perform for me.
readers: keep it brief, especially if you're new to the game. and, if it's long (IT SHOULDN'T BE, THO) please make it interesting. droning on about your stamp collection or whatever is boring. keep it spicy. please god ugh.