A few years ago my friend Steve Gadlin wisely bought up the domain name fart.com and asked his friends to contribute funny stories about farts to it. I didn't really have any but I did have a pee story. Unfortunately, life got in the way and Gadlin never got around to making the most of fart.com so this story has lingered around for years. This weekend we had guests in town, a wedding, and my kid's first birthday party and so I figured this would be a great day to just punt and feature my pee story. If you want to add your own below, please go ahead.

One of the best things about my college roommate Ann* was her pee pledge. It went, "If you ever laugh so hard you pee you pants, I guarantee I will find it so funny that I will pee my pants as well, so you won't be alone."

Ann was as good as her word: one day, walking back to our dorm after lunch, something made us laugh so hard that we had to stop in our tracks because the laughter was inhibiting our movement (sadly, the joke itself is lost to time.) Eventually the fact that we were laughing so hard made us laugh harder. You can guess what happened next. And then what happened next. Long story short, we both had some laundry to do that night, but Ann especially so.

But that was just a preview of things to come. Later on in college, Ann and I lived with two other girls, Susie and Pepper. One day, Ann, Susie and I were in my bedroom, crammed onto my bunk,  shooting the breeze and most likely avoiding doing homework. We were goofing around when Susie abruptly farted. It was the kind of concise, unexpected fart that sets three slap-happy girls off, and we began laughing hysterically.

"You guys, I might pee my pants!" Ann warned.

"Get off my bed!" I yelled, and Ann jumped off, and then we laughed harder. Predictably, Ann's pants eventually grew dark.

"What's so funny?" Pepper asked, coming into my room, but when she saw Ann's pants she fled back into her room. Ann headed into the bathroom to shower and emerged, fresh and clean in her pink terrycloth bathrobe.

Susie and I were still hanging out on my bed and I think we were actually re-hashing the pants-wetting when, unexpectedly, Ann's breast popped out of her robe. Being her roommate, I'd of course seen Ann's breasts several times before, but due the atmosphere of the afternoon, I shrieked. I didn't mean for this to be so funny, but it set us all off laughing again. And ol' Ann actually found a hidden reserve, just in case of emergency, of pee. Once again she peed her pants. Only this time she wasn't wearing any pants. So, my friend and housemate peed on the rug.

"Now what's going on?" Pepper asked, hearing new hysterics. She walked in as Ann was on her hands and knees, cleaning up the carpet.

"Ann peed on the rug!" Susie and I yelled, and this time, Pepper returned to her room, slammed the door and locked it. I guess she was too good for people who urinate on the ground, indoors.

THE END

*Names changed to protect the guilty.