List: Inventions I Would Like to Suggest Based on This Cold I Have

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Facial tissue that doesn't release a burst of dust when you unfold it

Facial tissue that doesn't disintegrate in your hands when you use it

Facial tissue that doesn't leave a "facial tissue mustache" in its wake

Facial tissue that lasts for more than two hearty blows

Invisible petroleum jelly that stays put when you smear it under your nose

Lip gloss that is resistant to facial tissue bits