Ideas for Christian Jugglers on How They Can Widen Their Client Base

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Someone sent me this website of a Christian juggler who uses routines to illustrate Christian things. ("Please keep in mind that a program can range in length from ten minutes to two hours based on your needs.") I think that David Cain can really broaden his horizons though if he considers a little flexibility in his routines to appeal to greater audiences.

For instance:

"David juggles while reading aloud a randomly selected Bible passage in order to illustrate the fact that we can always find a time to read God's Word, no matter how busy we are. (Psalm 119)"
Instead, how about:
"David juggles while reading aloud from the 'You Can Learn Spanish Easily!' workbook to illustrate how easy it is to learn Spanish, no matter how busy you are."

"In order to discuss God's forgiveness, rings are juggled that turn from red (representing sin) to white (representing forgiveness). (Isaiah 1:18)"
could be:
"In order to demonstrate Tide's bleaching power, rings are juggled that turn from red (representing a wine stain) to white (representing forgiveness.)"

"Using five balls, David illustrates the importance of keeping our focus on God as we walk through life. (Col. 3:2)"
easily becomes:
"Using five balls, David illustrates all the balls you keep in the air that contribute to the stress in your life, hence the need for Xanax."

"Three clubs are juggled in many ways to contrast the truth that Jesus is the only way to heaven. (John 14:6)"
becomes:
"Three clubs are juggled in many ways to contrast the truth that Seven for All Mankind jeans are the only way to be popular in school."

David juggles two balls and a handcuff key while handcuffed and frees himself using the key while still juggling. This helps to illustrate that Jesus is the only key that can free us from the chains of sin and death. (Psalm 116:16; John 8:36)
I think should be:
"David juggles two balls and a handcuff key while handcuffed and frees himself using the key while still juggling. This is just a taste of the excitement you'll catch this season on 'Law and Order.'"

Huge, air-filled garbage bags are juggled to illustrate the importance of not filling our lives with garbage. (Rom. 1:29-31)
easily becomes:
"Huge, air-filled garbage bags are used in a public service announcement about how it's wasteful to throw away air. Recycle it instead."


Four different types of juggling are performed at the same time to illustrate how Christians should work together using the gifts and abilities that God has given us. (1 Cor. 12:4-7; Heb. 10:25)
yum:
Four different types of juggling are used to illustrate how the primary four secret ingredients in KFC's chicken creates a truly magnificent meal for the whole family."

A Chinese Rhythm stick is used to tell the story of Paul the apostle. (Acts 9:1-31)
duh:
"A Chinese Rhythm stick entices you to check out the delicious flavors at Panda Express."

"A routine using five clubs is presented to discuss the fact that Jesus demonstrated His love for us by dying on the cross in our place. (Rom. 5:8)"
obviously transitions to:
"A routine using five clubs is presented to discuss the fact that Budweiser is truly the king of beers."

A story about a famous, but foolish juggler is told in order to discuss the importance of giving our lives to Jesus Christ. (Matt. 10:39)
=
"A story about a famous, but foolish juggler is told in order to discuss why it's important to invest with ING."