Today is the day to eat a brioche.

Looking for Team Pam/Team Karen shirts? Find them here!

Sampling of Golden-Globe-Related Text Messages I Sent Last Night

"I would do it w salma"

"J Hud wasn't all that. She looks good tho im happy 4 her"

"Marry me hugh laurie"

"I [love] toni collette. I [love] bening 4 boozing om camera."

"Yay eddie!"

"Siena y do u exist"

"[Vanessa Williams] is draggy"

"Fiesta"

"Drew cute. Prince black dracula"

"Americas hair sux"

{Re: Warren Beatty's speech): "So [freaking] tedious"