Today is the day to talk in an annoying fake southern accent all day, y'all.

Chicago--come often, come early!

I was very touched by the recent story of Dina Lohan, mother of actress Lindsay, who came to the rescue of her daughter. It seems like some people out there are interpreting Lindsay's recent ill health as a cover-up for over-partying ways. James G. Robinson, CEO of Morgan Creek Productions, scolded Lindsay in a letter for calling in sick on Wednesday to the set of the movie Georgia Rule. "We are well aware that your ongoing all-night heavy partying is the real reason for your so-called 'exhaustion,'" he wrote. It doesn't seem like you get to see celebrities get publicly called out like that these days. The whole letter is here.

However, Dina wasn't going to sit there and let her little girl be called out. "This is too much. Maybe he has personal issues with whomever, and it came out with my child. I don't know him. I can't judge him. I don't think it was a smart thing to do to a young girl," Dina told People magazine. You can read more about here response here.

I very much like the fact that Robinson did not say anything personal or directly insulting to Lindsay. He was upbraiding her as a boss would an employee. But nineteen years old is too young to be told what to do by anybody, is what Dina says.

Listen. I'm not that much older than Lindsay (to me, "not that much older" means "less than ten years older.") And Lindsay probably spends what I make in one year in one serious shopping trip. Which means that I work under much worse conditions than she does. If Lindsay Lohan is too young to be told 'what to do', by her boss, then so am I!

Thus, I am requesting that my mother start crafting some emails to my boss for when I get in trouble at work. "Girls just need to be girls--asking permission before taking allotted vacation time is uncalled-for," "Claire's spirit is independent but not yet fully matured--it's unnatural for her to follow the requests of a secondary superior also 'not much older than her,'" and "Claire needs her rest and relaxation and frequently suffers from heat exhaustion, which is why she cannot attend the company picnic," would cover the last few months or so (I got that 'heat exhaustion' one from you, Linds!)