September 24, 2002

Today is the day to know that today's list could have been a lot funnier.

 

• You forget to bring a towel to the shower and have to run naked and dripping through the halls to grab one.
• Shampoo in the eye
• Conditioner in the eye
• Soap in the eye
• St. Yves Apricot Scrub in your eye
• Razor cuts
• Shave foam that doesn't foam, just washes away
• Hair that sticks to you
• Hair that sticks to your back and travels southbound
• You accidentally drop a corner of the towel in the shower, soaking it and making it oddly heavy
• The crusted goop on pump lotion bottles
• You lean towards the sink, and either slip, or the carpet beneath you slips, so the only way you can prevent from breaking your face is by unintentially performing the Heimlich maneuver on yourself on the front of the sink.
• When you toss the toilet paper roll to the garbage can and miss.
• The hairbrush gets stuck in your hair and whips out of your hand.
• Hairspray that makes your scalp sticky
• Dental floss that makes you gag
• Eye cream ending up in your eye
• Bathtub that runs out of hot water just when you want a refill
• You drop your contact lens on the floor and can't find your glasses to find your contact lens because your contact lens is on the floor and you can't see without it
• Toothpaste that won't wash down the drain
• Spiders