All right, we need a new relevance/sexuality-proving dance move, ladies

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2823324082_56a5f21d67_z.jpgAll anybody a few people are talking about this morning is how Madonna and Miley Cyrus were grinding on each other during last night's "MTV Unplugged." When planning a performance like this, do you think the artists are like, "Yeah, and then we're going to grind on each other and it's going to be so hot and provocative!" or more like "And guess we end by grinding on each other? Sure, why not."?

Either way, this move is played, by both women and by women in general. Sexy girl-on-girl dancing was going on when I was in college. Madonna danced provocatively with Britney Spears, then Miley, and is probably just keeping her crotch ready and in the air for the next young upstart she needs to rub herself on. Miley's twerked on everyone from Santa to little people (this actually happened in the span of one performance.)

So it's losing its shock value. I don't have a problem with women expressing their sexuality or being provocative (it's fun! it's cool! I'm down!) but it's just a little sad that we keep returning to the same well, especially for Madonna, who, for someone known for re-inventing herself, seems to have run out of ideas in terms of changing things up (see, in addition to the grinding, wearing suits and, embarrassingly, sporting a grill.)

Can't we come up with other ways for female performers to interact with each other and show their sexuality/solidarity, just to change things up? Like maybe they can hold their bank statements up to the camera to brag about how rich they are. Or they can do a double-dutch jump rope routine (seriously, I would love this.) They can force all the people they've ever had sex with to perform a choreographed dance while they sit back and judge. Or they get double pap smears onstage to demonstrate that they're on point when it comes to gynecological health? I'm just saying, we need something new or else these shows are going to get way too predictable and we'll have nothing new to talk about.

Unless...these performances all about pleasing men? Well if that's the case, carry on, I guess. Don't change a thing.